I’m Awake

It’s Friday and I’m awake. I don’t feel like being awake but yet, I am.

Why be awake when there is nothing for me to do?

I feel a little better than I did yesterday but not enough to chance my mood or get me out of this funk.

Talked with my husband last night and I think we are on the same page but I still feel alone even with his assurances that I’m not. It’s my thinking that’s fucked up. I don’t think I am worthy enough of anything but pain and suffering. I just feel like being alone is in everyone’s best interest.

It’s a shame when you’re so far gone down into the depression hole that no assurance or kind and supporting words help change your mood.

So yeah, why should I stay awake?
There’s nothing to do and no place to go. I could go get coffee but that won’t cure anything and I will be out of the house wanting to take a ride and I have no gas to do so.

Back to bed it is.

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