I can’t get enough sleep. I slept yesterday away and am trying to force myself from getting back in my bed and going back to sleep right now. These meds are making me so sleepy, but they are working. So what to I do? I’m already on the lowest dosage for both of them and I really don’t want to play guinea pig to another set of meds. I guess I just tough it out.

I’m trying to drink coffee to keep my ass awake and that’s not working either. You would think that drinking almost a whole carafe of coffee would have someone wired and totally awake but that isn’t the case. I’m just as sleepy now as I was pre-coffee.

I also have no energy. I think about things that I can do but I don’t (and won’t) do them. I just want sleep.

I’m tempted to not take my morning meds to see if it helps me stay awake. I wonder if I take them all at night if that will make a difference? I’m thinking that it would but I’m to scared to try. Maybe I will ask my psych. I can email her today and see if she responds.

I’m worried that my husband is going to get mad or aggravated that I’m sleeping so much. He assures me that he isn’t mad and he won’t get mad but you know how my brain works. I’m paranoid over every little thing. I think that he will think that I am just being lazy. I’m not! I just cannot stay awake for anything. I hope he really doesn’t get tired of me sleeping. :/

My mama has her consult with the surgeon and the oncologist today. I am hoping that this appointment will give her more information about the whole picture. There’s so much we don’t know right now. We don’t know if it’s in the lymph nodes and we don’t know what stage it is in. She’s killing herself with worry and it’s understandable. I’m completely a worried mess for her so there’s no way that I can imagine how she feels. All I can do is pray and hope for answers and a good outcome. Any prayers and positive thoughts are most appreciated.

I don’t really have anything else to write about at the moment. The only things on my mind are more sleep and my mama.

Maybe I will write more later and post some articles that I saved.

Maybe. *yawn*


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